Some things you should be watching, and various other odds and ends
I don't normally make public service announcements on my blog, because I believe that blogs should be exclusively about painful truths, like Thuy Trang's death and the existence of Remus Lupin porn. You should come away from my works of terrible beauty weeping with joy. But that joy should be born of despair. Sweet black despair.
Nevertheless, sometimes, I feel that it's necessary to elevate my fellow men, to shine the light of wisdom and truth upon them, to lift them up, just as the British East India Company lifted up the little fuzzy wuzzies.
You should be watching these TV shows maggot.
1. Wonder Showzen
The first time I watched this show, I dismissed it as sensationalist clap trap. After all, anyone can take little kids, let them loose in New York City, and have them spout offensive zingers. But then I saw a cute as a button little girl tell a veterinary nurse that she had probably "seen more privates fall than Fallujah in spring." And then I was in love. With the show, not the little girl.
2. The Office
Contrary to popular belief, the American version of The Office is actually better than the British version, because Pam is much hotter than Dawn.
3. Battlestar Galactica
For a show about the remnants of mankind on the run from a seemingly omnipotent race of mechanical beings, there's a ridiculous amount of sex going on. I guess it makes sense that you'd want to have a lot of sex if your species were almost wiped out, but half the sex is human on robot! But they're pretty damn sexy robots. One of them is this blond with a killer rack and legs from here to yaamygod.
Anyway, the main plot of this show is that Edward James Olmos is the leader of a rag tag bunch of kids. They may not believe in themselves, but he believes in them. When he teaches them calculus and they pass the AP test, the AP Board is skeptical and forces the class to retake it. But, in the end, they stand and deliver, and Olmos's bunch of snot nosed Mexicans show the world that Latinos aren't inherently stupid, they're just inherently lazy.
Actually, I think that's the plot to "Stand and Deliver." But replace "Mexicans" with "the fine officers and enlisted men of the Battlestar Galactica" and "AP Board" with "Cylon killing machines" and it's pretty much the same thing. However, Olmos is definitely the Captain, and he's definitely Mexican. Well, I don't know for sure if they still have Mexicans in the future, but they still have lawns and Chevys, so I put two and two together.
Speaking of broad racial stereotypes, I think the other day was "Don't work if you're a dirty Mexican Immigrant" Day. Wait, isn't that everyday?
Ba-zing.
4. V for Vendetta
I know this isn't a TV Show, but where did I say this was a list of TV shows you should watch? Oh, in the introduction? Shut up. This movie kicks all kinds of ass, in large part because Hugo Weaving has a sexy voice and Natalie Portman has a sexy everything.
I don't normally make public service announcements on my blog, because I believe that blogs should be exclusively about painful truths, like Thuy Trang's death and the existence of Remus Lupin porn. You should come away from my works of terrible beauty weeping with joy. But that joy should be born of despair. Sweet black despair.
Nevertheless, sometimes, I feel that it's necessary to elevate my fellow men, to shine the light of wisdom and truth upon them, to lift them up, just as the British East India Company lifted up the little fuzzy wuzzies.
You should be watching these TV shows maggot.
1. Wonder Showzen
The first time I watched this show, I dismissed it as sensationalist clap trap. After all, anyone can take little kids, let them loose in New York City, and have them spout offensive zingers. But then I saw a cute as a button little girl tell a veterinary nurse that she had probably "seen more privates fall than Fallujah in spring." And then I was in love. With the show, not the little girl.
2. The Office
Contrary to popular belief, the American version of The Office is actually better than the British version, because Pam is much hotter than Dawn.
3. Battlestar Galactica
For a show about the remnants of mankind on the run from a seemingly omnipotent race of mechanical beings, there's a ridiculous amount of sex going on. I guess it makes sense that you'd want to have a lot of sex if your species were almost wiped out, but half the sex is human on robot! But they're pretty damn sexy robots. One of them is this blond with a killer rack and legs from here to yaamygod.
Anyway, the main plot of this show is that Edward James Olmos is the leader of a rag tag bunch of kids. They may not believe in themselves, but he believes in them. When he teaches them calculus and they pass the AP test, the AP Board is skeptical and forces the class to retake it. But, in the end, they stand and deliver, and Olmos's bunch of snot nosed Mexicans show the world that Latinos aren't inherently stupid, they're just inherently lazy.
Actually, I think that's the plot to "Stand and Deliver." But replace "Mexicans" with "the fine officers and enlisted men of the Battlestar Galactica" and "AP Board" with "Cylon killing machines" and it's pretty much the same thing. However, Olmos is definitely the Captain, and he's definitely Mexican. Well, I don't know for sure if they still have Mexicans in the future, but they still have lawns and Chevys, so I put two and two together.
Speaking of broad racial stereotypes, I think the other day was "Don't work if you're a dirty Mexican Immigrant" Day. Wait, isn't that everyday?
Ba-zing.
4. V for Vendetta
I know this isn't a TV Show, but where did I say this was a list of TV shows you should watch? Oh, in the introduction? Shut up. This movie kicks all kinds of ass, in large part because Hugo Weaving has a sexy voice and Natalie Portman has a sexy everything.
posted by Michael at 10:43 PM
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